The Mafia’s Wanted Desires

ASHLEY

A devastating clearance.

The clearance that I needed.

His room wasn’t a sight to see. It was almost empty, nearly everything was gone. I shook my head sideways, in disagreement. I marched towards the bed, ripping the sheets and duvet off, scattering the pillows, and kicking my heels off my feet.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

“Adam!”

“Adam!”

“Baby, where are you?!”

“Baby, I’m here.” I croaked, marching into the bathroom, hoping I would see the shower running, and see him relaxing in the bathtub, where he was waiting for me to come to join him. I pushed the door open and my eyes narrowed on the sink that always contained his toiletries, staring back at me, void of even a pin!

The tears won’t stop dropping from my face, increasing even. I weakly let go of the doorknob, leaving the door that led to the ensuite bathroom ajar. I strode into his closet, and my palms found themselves plastering over my mouth and snapping it shut, in shock.

His clothes were all gone.

His belongings were nowhere to be found.

How could he do this to me? How could he do this to us? Where did I go wrong? What went wrong with us that couldn’t be fixed? Where did I miss it? Was this him being a better man? Being the man that I deserve, by leaving me high and dry, leaving me out in the cold when the going gets tough? Was this the forever he promised me?

I tried being the perfect girl. I tried being the perfect girlfriend. I tried bending my rules for him. I lived for him. I stopped doing the things that made me happy, just to please him. I lost myself in all of this, at the expense of his happiness! I fought valiantly for us, for our relationship. I turned deaf ears to my mom’s advice.

How could I have been so foolish to think he was willing to settle down with me? How could I have been such a fool?! A dumb, dumb, stupid girl. Mom tried to talk me out of it, but I never listened.

My vision was overly blurry, my head was pounding so hard. I couldn’t breathe. I tried breathing, but I couldn’t catch my breath. It was as though walls were closing in on me. I dropped to the floor, sobbing loudly. I could feel my tear ducts starting to run dry. I gasped softly for breath and crawled towards the last compartment that contained my few clothes that were in there.

I started pulling everything out, dumping it on the floor. I didn’t care if some of my expensive shoes and bags could get damaged. I just wanted to get out of here. I was suffocating so badly. After taking all my clothes out, my eyes scoured the entire room, searching for a bag where I could stuff my things. I sniffed, hiccuping loudly.

Then, I moved forward, my gaze totally fixed ahead, not sparing a glance at my front, causing my foot to hit the edge of the lower compartment of the shelf that was formerly used for the storage of Adam’s clothes, eliciting a loud wince from me.

I let out a low hiss, and squatted, massaging my feet. My eyes strayed to the black leather backpack, peeking out of the last drawer, and I heaved a sigh of relief. I pulled it out, unzipping it. The first thing I laid my eyes on had color draining out of my face, leaving my face as blank as that of a Ghost. They were pictures of Adam, but that wasn’t the only thing. He was kissing a black-haired lady in the picture.

I let out an ear-splitting agonizing scream, clutching the picture so tightly in my hands. The tear duct that I thought had gone dry, immediately produced a huge amount of tears that wouldn’t stop trailing down my cheek, furiously. He appeared so engrossed in the atrocity he was committing, locking lips with the lady.

I’m a fool.

A big one at that.

So stupid to think I could change him. That I could tame him. How could I have shrugged off the huge red flags that were blinking at me, and showed me the way out? I nearly lost my friends because of him. They tried to warn me but I was too naive to listen. It finally made sense now. It made a lot of sense.

How he would always pass on lingering looks to beautiful women that walk past us, whenever we are out together, how he would always make flirty comments about any woman he sees. It was funny how all these signs were right in front of me, but I was too blind to see them. No, I chose to be blind to it.

I took all the pictures out, and then, emptied the contents of the backpack on the floor, a newspaper fell out in the process. I picked it up with shaky hands, scared of what I wasn’t sure I would come across next. I have had enough for the day. I couldn’t deal anymore.

Every ounce of blood drained out of my face at the sight of the headlines that graced the front of the paper. The font was so bold.

My breathing seized.

My eyes watered, with my mouth hung open in the air. I veered backwards, utterly appalled, without being shoved by anything. My feet appeared glued to the ground, and my heart pummeled against my chest. Heck, I could hear the sounds in my ear.

Fear enveloped me.

The headlines stared right back at me, haunting me and mocking me silently, with their presence. It read ‘BILLIONAIRE MAFIA BOSS, HEAD OF THE VIXEN MAFIA, JAXON ARDEN GRAY, CAUGHT ON CAMERA AT THE AIRPORT’ And no, it wasn’t the caption that stopped my breathing, it was the picture of the man that occupied nearly the whole page, clad in a perfectly tailored three-piece suit, looking devilishly hot.

The same man that I slept with.

The same man I cheated on Adam with.

The same man who gave me a fucking hickey that won’t leave my neck. The same man that my body responded to like I had known him for years. The man that took my virginity.

The revelation rendered my entire blood cold, my mind and brain blank, in a momentary shutdown that felt as though it was permanent. The hair on my nape stood erect, one by one chill crawling down my spine, fear punching me in the guts.

What the fuck have I done? Ashley, what the fuck have you done?

Jaxon Arden Gray, Leader of the Vixen Mafia. Jaxon Gray. Gray’s Lounge. Vixen Mafia. They were all connected. It made so much sense. He was the owner of the Lounge, which was the reason he owned a suite. That was the reason those guards tried to stop me from going in. Stop me from making a grave mistake!

I let out a harsh breath. It was as if my breath was punched out of me through my lungs. I could feel them closing up, leaving my throat severely clogged with sobs. I held on to the wall for support, wheezing loudly.

I couldn’t breathe.

I couldn’t think.

I couldn’t see anything, due to my blurred vision!

I slept with the leader of the deadliest gang in the country. I had a one-night stand with him. The most ruthless mafia boss.

If I wasn’t sure of anything else, I was sure of this.

I was completely and irrevocably screwed. My life was finally over. I didn’t know how long I sat there, I was utterly frozen in that spot, staring at the picture of the man that has haunted me ever since the night he deflowered me.

I’m so fucked.