Chapter 13: 12- An Explanation
Chapter 13: 12- An Explanation
“Babykinny…” Alpha Chris taunted, “you know what day it is?” he had a menacing grin on his face.
I didn’t answer, I knew what day it was. I knew what was coming. My birthday beating.
“Answer me, bitch!” he screamed, kicking me down in my gut. I grunted, and he yanked me up by my
hair, “it’s your birthday, precious mate… and I’ve got something special planned for you!” he said in a
singing voice.
I was dumb. I tried to move out of his grip, he punched me in my face, but per usual I put my hands up
to try and protect my face. “put your fucking hands down!”
I couldn’t help but obey. I took his hits raw- they numbed my face.
“You’ve been a bad girl Violet,” he tsk-ed, I cringed. I wasn’t a bad girl, I was a good girl
“A-alpha, I’m s-s-sorry, I’ll be g-good, I- I’m a good g-girl.” I stuttered.
“Nu-uh!” he tsk-ed, “Violet…” he sang, “I hate that you had to ruin your birthday gift, but I guess you
can still have it!” He pushed my body down on the bed in his room, as I was cleaning it, the birthday
clean.
He immediately crushed my body as he crawled on top of me. I was confused, what is he doing?
“Violet, happy twelfth birthday, matey!” he grinned. His hands found my shirt and ripped it off, along with
my training bra. “You’re gonna love this babykinny, but not as much as I will…” he mumbled the last
part and it was then I decided to try and push him off of me. But a twelve-year-old was no match for a
twenty-eight-year-old man.
“Don’t be a bad girl. Stop... fucking struggling…” He grunted, taking both my wrist and pinning them
down with one hand as his other trailed down to my pants.
What is he doing?
He started to yank them down along with my underwear- oh, OH!
“N-no, g-get o-off of me!” I screamed as my sobs built up.
“Shut up!” he grunted and slapped me.
I screamed for him to let me go, to stop, I was begging- pleading with him. I would do anything,
anything for him to stop- but he plugged into my innocence and stripped the last of my humanity away.
-----
“Violet!” someone shouted as they shook me. My eyes sprung open at the unfamiliar hands grabbing
me. My mind instantly played back to the memory in my unconscious state.
“G-get off of me!” I screamed and struggled against the grasp. It tightened.
“Violet, Violet, calm down!” the voice attempted to soothe.
I sobbed as my pushes became weaker.
“Flower...it’s okay…” the voice spoke.
Flower.
“Flower, look at me, it’s okay. You’re okay…” I brought my teary eyes up to see Derek on the side of the
bed holding my arms.
I wanted him off of me after that dream, but my wolf craved him in every way. Comfort.
That was the day I finally learned what sex really was. In the form of rape. On my twelfth birthday.
I sobbed and brought my hands up to cover my face as I mumbled apologies to Derek. It had to be
about six in the morning as the sun was rising.
“Flower, shh, it’s okay…” he brought me to his chest, rubbing my arms.
After some time my sobs cleared and I was left a hiccuping mess in front of the Alpha.
I hesitantly pulled away from him and looked down at my lap in shame.
“I… I’m s-sorry. I’ll go g-get changed n-now…” I mumbled and got up, walking around him to the closet
and then the bathroom.
The door was fixed now, it must’ve got done sometime last night with Derek. I quickly got dressed in a
long-sleeve shirt and a pair of jeans and put on some makeup, the best I could with no mirror. I walked
back out and saw Doctor Reseda and Derek in the room.
“Good morning Violet,” Doctor Reseda smiled and I did a polite smile back before looking down at my
gauze-wrapped wrists. “I’m just here to check your cuts, as Alpha has informed me.”
I nodded and was told to sit on the bed. She quickly cleaned and wrapped them, telling me how I was
lucky they didn’t get infected with some glass shards.
She bowed her head to Derek and then left. I looked at him and he put a cold gaze on me.
“I’m s-sorry,” I mumbled to him, putting my head down in shame.
Derek sighed. “Violet, do you not understand the danger you’re doing?” his voice was stern and he told
me to look at him. His eyes were hard. “I thought about it- you are no longer allowed by any glass by
yourself. That’s an order from your Alpha.” he was getting visibly angrier by the second.
“Yes, s-sir.” I was so ashamed of myself. I went years doing this behind Alpha Chris's back, and nothing
ever happened.
“Why…” he started, but seemed to pause to contain his anger, “why were you trying to kill yourself?” he
questioned through clenched teeth.
He folded his arms over his broad chest and I swallowed.
“Alp… I-I wasn’t t-trying to kill m-myself…”.
'You should’ve slut…'
He growled and closed his eyes, taking deep breaths. “Well, Violet,” he spat and I flinched at the
memories, “what were you doing?” he growled, his eyes killing me slowly with his glare.
It slipped out before I could stop myself. “Punishing myself…” I mumbled and then realized I said it out
loud. I cringed and prayed for death.
“You were what?!” he shouted. Tears pricked my eyes.
'Crybaby…'
“Tell me, Violet, what were you fucking ‘punishing yourself’ for?” he growled.
“For being a s-slut…” words were flying out of my mouth. I didn’t want to tell him this but it was like I
wasn’t in control.
He chuckled. It was dry and humorous, but he was piecing together the bits.
“For kissing me?” he mocked. I nodded my head, knowing if I opened my mouth I’d be sobbing. He
hummed.
“Didn’t know it was a crime to kiss your mate.” he spat in a low voice. Maybe I wasn’t supposed to hear
it, but I did.
Again, I couldn’t help the apology that left my lips.
“Stop fucking apologizing for everything,” he growled.
I apologized again and cringed. He raised an eyebrow at me and I went to apologize again but he
raised a hand to cease my talking.
My face was hot with embarrassment.
“I’ll call Mallory…” he mumbled and left the room, slamming the door on the way out. Once he left, a
sob escaped. Why did I have to ruin everything?
I knew I deserved my punishment. I was a slut, I deserved it, I knew that. But Derek didn’t agree,
maybe that should tell me something.
A knock sounded at the door and I wiped my eyes before answering.
“Hey, Viv.” Mallory smiled at me, I did a half-closed mouth smile back before dropping my head to him.
“Let’s go get some breakfast, yeah?” he said, leading me out of the room.
I couldn't concentrate on anything Mallory was saying throughout breakfast. I would barely nod along to
what he was saying. I wasn’t eating the eggs on my plate, instead, I was pushing them around.
'This is why you’re not gaining weight…'
'Stick…'
'It’s so unattractive…'
'This is why you ‘mate’ doesn’t want you…'
“Violet!” Mallory snapped me out of my thoughts, I brought my head up to his. He blinked a few times
before speaking, “Viv, you’re crying…” he mumbled as his eyes looked at my cheeks.
“Oh...s-sorry…” I whispered and wiped my cheeks.
“It’s okay,” he assured, “do you wanna go on a run? You know, shift?” I felt like I had to agree so I
nodded my head. He linked Derek and then took me out to the woods.
We were out for a while. I got easily tired, but he didn’t seem to want to go in right away, and I didn’t
want to bum him out by saying I was tired, so we stayed out.
Now we were fully clothed and were back in Derek’s house. It was about lunchtime so we had a
sandwich and then he said he had to go see Derek for something about his beta duties.
I was told to wait outside as they discussed the topics and I did so. Obediently. Like a good girl.
They were done soon and Mallory said he had to go do his beta business. I hesitantly knocked on the
big brown door.
Derek opened it and I timidly walked in.
Why was I here? He’s shown clear signs of disinterest. Again, I’m blaming it on my wolf. This isn’t me. I
wasn’t a slut.
“Flower, is there something you need?” he asked in a monotone voice as he closed the door.
I turned to face him and silently shook my head ‘no’. Please check at N/ôvel(D)rama.Org.
He hummed. His eyes seemed to turn darker as he looked at me. He slowly scoped my body, and
normally I would’ve started to panic, and cry. But with him, it was confusing because I wasn’t. I wasn’t
panicking, I wasn’t crying.
He walked towards me, slowly, teasingly. He stopped once he was a few feet in front of me. Slowly he
put his hands around my waist and pulled me closer to his chest.
My breath caught in my throat as he put his head on my shoulder. His hands were slightly rubbing my
sides and I seemed to relax in his grip.
He lightly kissed my neck, trailing upwards to my face, lightly skimming my skin in the process. I
couldn’t help the shudder.
“Flower…” he whispered against my skin, “you drive me crazy…” his voice was so low, I barely heard
him.
I didn’t respond. Instead, I bought my shaky hands on his torso. Sparks shot up my arms. He grabbed
my chin and tilted my face up to his. His eyes were a dark navy blue, clouded in lust. Slowly he leaned
in and pressed his lips to mine.
My eyes fluttered close. Just like the first time, it was incredible. He was warm and soft, I don't think I’ll
ever be able to get over it. I moved in sync against his lips. I never kissed anyone back before, besides
the first time we kissed. What if I was a bad kisser?
He softly pulled away from me. When I opened my eyes, his were still closed. He mumbled a curse and
tightened his grip for a second before letting go.
“Leave,” he spoke softly, seeming like he was trying to control an unnamed emotion. He pinched the
bridge of his nose and I quietly left.