The Alpha

Chapter 12: 11- Glass

He broke the door down.

He kicked it down and through my blurry vision, you could see the steam coming off of him. I was

scared of what he would do. He specifically told me multiple times to not harm myself. But what am I

currently doing? Sitting in a puddle of my blood from my actions.

I should be far from scared, I should be terrified. I should be, but I’m too numb to feel currently. He told

me he took away all possible threats from my room, so the voices had me shatter the mirror. You don’t

have an object, you make one.

'This is what you deserve slut…'

My hazy vision wasn’t helping my situation. Part of me- the messed up part- was pissed he walked in

when I barely got any cuts in, the small, sensible part was glad.

Despite him being there, my voices took over and forced my shaky hands to grip the glass shard and

attempt to move it down my wrist. Attempted. Failed.

Derek yanked it away from me and threw it across the bathroom floor. My eyes lazily followed as it

skidded across the tile, creating a blood trail.

“The fuck are you thinking, Violet?” He shouted at me. I’m in trouble. I couldn’t help the shaking my

body emitted. “Violet, fucking look at me,” he roughly grabbed my face in his stern hands and directed

his face to mine, “what the hell are you doing!” he was yelling in my face.

My tears fell down my cheeks as I stammered out an apology. I didn’t like that he was yelling at me,

although I understood why he was, he repeatedly told me not to do this. He was right to be mad at me,

but I just hated that he was yelling at me.

His grip tightens on my face, “shut up, just shit… don’t fucking talk..” he growled.

He roughly let go of my face and yanked my wrist towards him and I cried out at the burning sensation

of him touching them.

“Violet, you did this to yourself…” he growled.

'You did this to yourself fucktoy…'

'Chris…'

Forget about not being scared or terrified, I was now petrified. I tried to yank my hands away from him.

He was just like Chris. He was going to punish me.

“Fucking- stop moving!” He growled but my actions didn’t stop.

“A-alpha, I-I’m s-sorry…” I viscously tried to yank my arms away from him, “s-sorry, A-alpha, d-don’t h-

hurt me…” I hiccuped and he gripped my arms tighter earning a pained sob from me, “p-please, I-I…”

“Violet!” He shouted at me and then cursed under his breath. He got up from his crouched position,

grabbed a towel, ran it underwater, and came back. “Flower, I’m- fuck…” he huffed and I flinched.

Flower.

He pressed the cold, wet blanket to my wrist and I gasped and tried to jerk away at the unfamiliar

sensation.

“Flower…” that word brought a sense of safety to my mind, “you’re okay, I’m just cleaning it, stop

moving or it’ll hurt more,” his voice took an icy turn at the end.

“A-alp-” I tried to apologize again only for him to cut me off.

“Derek. Flower, it’s Derek,” he mumbled but I heard him.

( ‘It’s okay, it’s Derek. Violet, it’s okay.’ )

Derek cleaned my wounds and grabbed a medical kit that I didn’t know was under the sink. He

wrapped my wrist and left the bathroom for a second, bringing a change of pajamas, as mine was

stained with my impulsive gore.

“Lift your arms,” Derek instructed and I cautiously did so. His hands found the hem of my shirt and

started to pull up. Immediately my hands fell to stop his actions but he put them back, “keep them up.

I’m not going to do anything, I’m just changing you.”

I didn’t want that, but I didn’t have the energy to fight it. Gingerly he stripped me and dressed me in the

new pajamas. He didn’t pay attention to my tattoos of abuse.

Derek helped me up and walked out to the bed as he called someone to clean the blood in the

bathroom. I sat at the edge of the bed and he told me to stay as he answered the door for the person to

come in.

I didn’t pay much attention to them and they were done quickly, leaving Derek and I. I was scared. I

messed up again.

'You’re so worthless.'

It was silent. I cautiously looked up at him, he was glaring at me. I feel uncomfortable and worse than I

would normally feel if anyone else were to look at me in such a manner. I didn’t like it. I wanted to fix it.

“D-Derek, I-”

“No. Flow…” he shook his head, “Violet, you’re not off the hook that easily.” My heart raced at his words

and my head fell in fear and embarrassment. “Look at me,” he commanded and my face unwillingly

lifted to his, “you will listen, understand?” I nodded and he growled, “words, Violet,” he spoke through

clenched teeth.

“Y-yes -alpha…”

“What. The. Fuck. Were. You. Thinking!” he shouted causing me to flinch, “don’t fucking flinch at me,

Violet! I specifically removed all possible hazards from the room, but what do you go and do? You

fucking make a new one!”

My eyes started to fill with tears and I so desperately wanted to break eye contact with him, but his

eyes were full of promises of what would happen if I did. He walked closer to me and slightly crouched

down, roughly grabbing my chin. I choked on a sob at his action.

“Stop crying, Violet. Is this what I get? “ he asks. Huh? I didn’t understand what he was talking about “I

kiss you once and you try to kill yourself!” he humorously chuckled.

“I-I… I w-wasn’t try…” I mumbled but stopped when his grip tightened.

“What?” he flung in my face.

“I wasn’t t-trying to k-kill myse...myself…” I whispered and felt my tears overfill and slide down my

cheeks.

Rage lit up in his blue orbs, turning them a deep navy color. He opened his mouth and closed it a few

times before- once again- tightening his grip in a deadly hold. I bit my lip to stop the sob from going

past but it didn’t work. A pained cry left my mouth.

Derek mumbled a curse and let go of my face. He paced back and forth in the room, curses leaving his

plump lips every few moments.

Subconsciously my hands found the edges of the bandages and started to pick and mess with them.

Derek turned back around, his eyes quickly found the action my hands were doing.

“What the-” he rushed to me and pried my hands apart, “fucking...Violet! Stop messing with them!” I

instantly recoiled when he grabbed me, “I-I can’t do this tonight, shit. You’re going to bed.”

He swiftly left my hands to retreat to the bathroom and came back with my sleeping pills. He told me to

stay and he went to his office to grab a water bottle, but he also came back with another container of

pills.

I felt guilty that I was selfish enough to ruin his night. I could’ve been quieter when I broke the mirror-

but I had to be loud and cause him to come up here.

'Selfish bitch…'

Derek came back over to me with a bottle and a scowl tattooed on his face.

“Violet,” he spoke coolly, “listen, you’re going to take this,” he handed me the unknown pill and water,

waiting for me to take it.

I didn’t, I kept it in the palm of my hand and frowned, looking up at him. Content bel0ngs to Nôvel(D)r/a/ma.Org.

“W-what is i-it?” I asked, my voice small.

“It’s an iron tablet, honey. You lost blood, just take it. You’ll be fine.” He opened the bottle of my

sleeping pills and pulled one out as I hesitantly put the iron tablet in my mouth, taking water with it

“Now, take this and go to bed,” he handed me the pill, waiting for me to take it and swallow before

continuing, “and in the morning, I’ll deal with this… mess. Understand?” there was no arguing with his

tone.

“Y-yes, Alpha,” I whispered.

I expected him to leave after that, so I could go to bed, but he didn’t. He was staring at me, expectantly.

“A-aren’t you g-going to leave?” I hesitantly asked him.

“No, I’m not leaving until you’re asleep since you have a habit of doing things you’re not supposed to.”

His stare fell into a glare for a second.

I felt embarrassed all of a sudden, seeing how I don’t sleep in a bed. This certainly is an awkward

situation...

“W-well, I… I, um, don’t s-sleep in the bed…” my face was burning in awkwardness.

“Then what’s the purpose of it?” I didn’t expect him to respond like that...

“I-”

I could see the gears turning in his mind, “I’m assuming you slept on the ground in Christopher’s

pack?” He raised an eyebrow at me like he knew he was right, “you’re used to it?”

I couldn’t help as my mouth slightly parted in shock and I nodded.

...He was smart…

“Well, Violet, I’m not ignorant. I’m an alpha that rules over twelve states, I would hope to have a brain.”

My cheeks got heated from my insensible thought.

“Get in bed.” He motioned with his chin and I slightly got up and walked to the side, climbing in.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but I’m pretty sure this was heaven. The bed was cushiony in the all

right spots and it felt like a cloud. I could live here.

I tried going to bed, but I couldn’t, my eyes wouldn’t shut. I felt the bed dip next to me and my head

snapped over. Derek sat on the bed resting his back on the headboard. He looked over at me when he

felt my gaze.

“Relax, Violet, I’m not going to touch you,” he said, annoyed.

'There you go, annoy someone else…'

'Hope he beats you like Chris...'

I nodded and turned my eyesight back to the ceiling. It was silent, the only noise present was our

breathing. I didn’t feel drowsy in the slightest. I laid there for what felt like forever until Derek smashed

the quietude with his voice.

“You really don’t like following directions, do you?” his tone was neutral and I couldn’t tell if he was

upset or not. I looked over at him, “I tell you to do something and you do the opposite!” he dryly

chuckled.

“What?” I whispered, confused.

“I tell you to call me Derek, you still call me ‘Alpha’. I tell you to stop harming yourself- you broke a

mirror to do so. I tell you to sleep, and it’s been ten minutes- you’re still awake.” my face got heated at

his words. I was disrespecting him.

“I...I-I’m s-sorry for d-disrespecting you…” I apologized.

He sighed and shook his head, “Violet- that’s not- whatever.” he sighed out and again, it was silent.

“Tell me about yourself,” Derek demanded, I tilted my head back to him to see him staring at me.

“What do you want to know?” it came out rushed and my face flushed at it. He shrugged, making it

clear that he wasn’t going to verbally answer. “I, um…”

“Tell me about your parents.”

I turned my head back to the ceiling and answered him, “I d-don’t know m-much about them… I s-

somewhat r-remember my d-dad. Barely.”

“When was the last time you saw them?” he quizzed.

“When… when I w-was nine…” I mumbled, my mind slightly dozy and my eyes started to feel heavy.

He hummed in response. When he asked the next question his voice was quieter like he knew the pills

were kicking in, “were you born in Christopher’s pack?”

“I… yes.” I trailed feeling my eyes droop close. Usually, the pills don’t take this quick to kick in, maybe

it’s the bed…

My mind was tuning in and out of its conscious state, and soon I felt myself mainly in its senseless

form.

“Goodnight, Flower…” was the last, faint thing I heard before I was completely taken down by the little

pill.