Chapter 97
Nolan’s POV
I lay in my bed, wide awake, unable to even blink after what I had witnessed with Rowan and Nesta. My mind was a whirlwind of emotions–anger, jealousy, confusion–but what I didn’t expect to feel was arousal.
I was glad the pants I wore were loose enough to hide it, but the sight of them together, naked and entangled like we used to be months ago, awakened something deep inside me.
That part of me I thought had died when I rejected Nesta, it was still there, lurking, and now roaring back to life. I don’t know what the hell is going on anymore. I’m just… well I’m just here I guess.
I never dreamt about sharing my mate with my brother, but that was how it was destined to be then. Now, though? I don’t want her with him. Not now or ever again. He has Nora.
I want her for myself. She is MY soulmate and not his, and I’m possessive of her
even though she used to be his first. And I don’t exactly blame her. I ca that even if I want to.
t do
I told her she was my mistress and nothing more. But feelings are getting in the way. I’m getting messed up. I never thought I would have feelings for a fucking Healer but here I am. Deep.
Building her a fucking art room myself? Making sure she eats her favourite meal all the time? Keeping a physician close by in case her pregnancy needs it?
Going to the Red Moon Pack to avenge what they did to her and other dumb shit? I even fucking bathed her after she fucked my brother. Just imagine this whole
scenario. Fuck.
Every time I think about Nesta, my heart aches. She used to be Rowan’s mate, but she’s mine now. I can feel the connection, the bond that’s more than just physical. IIt’s in the way she looks at me, the way she responds to my touch, the way she tries to hide her tears when she thinks I’m not looking. But tonight, seeing her with Rowan, it was like a knife twisting in my gut.
I knew it was a mistake to let this happen, to let her go to him. But I had no right
her. Not when I had pushed her away myself. Then again, this will end
to stop
tonight.
I tried to rationalise it. I told myself that I had only wanted to keep things simple, to keep my heart protected. But who was I kidding? My heart was anything but
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It was wide open, bleeding, and aching for her. I had tried to convince myself that it was just the bond, just the mark that made me feel this way. It wasn’t.
But it was more than that. It was the way she made me feel alive, the way she made me want to be a better person. The way she stares at me when she is cumming like I gave her the fucking moon
When I gave her a shower earlier, she was quietly watching me trying to gauge my reaction throughout but couldn’t. She doesn’t know what is going on with me but I know.
I am massively and embarrassingly attracted to her both emotionally and physically.
And now, as I lay here, I couldn’t help but replay the scene over and over in my head. The way Rowan had looked at her, the way he had touched her, it made me want to rip him apart. But I couldn’t blame him.
Not entirely. He had loved her first. He had marked her first. But she was mine now, and I wasn’t going to let him take her away from me. MY soulmate. He cou go to HIS soulmate too.
I thought about the things I had done for her, the lengths I had gone to make her happy. Building her the art room, making sure she had everything she needed, keeping her favourite foods stocked.
It wasn’t just about making her comfortable; it was about showing her that I cared, that she mattered to me.
And maybe, just maybe, it was about proving to myself that I could be more than just an alpha prince. I could be a mate, a lover, a protector. Dammit, I was all of those.
But tonight, seeing her with Rowan, it felt like all of that was slipping away. I had let my guard down, let her in, and now I was paying the price.
I wanted to scream, to shout, to do something to release the anger and frustration boiling inside me. But I knew it wouldn’t change anything. The damage was done, and now I had to figure out how to fix it.
I couldn’t keep lying to myself. I couldn’t keep pretending that this was just about the bond or the mark. It was about her, about the way she made me feel, about the way I felt when I was with her.
And if I was going to make this work, if I was going to keep her, I had to be honest. with myself. I had to be honest with her. I want her. Fuck. I want her so much.
Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and tried to calm my racing thoughts. Tomorrow, I will talk to her. I would tell her how I felt, tell her what she meant to me.
And maybe, just maybe, we could find a way to make this work. Because losing her was not an option. Not now, not ever.