Arranged Mafia Marriage

“I thought…that you’d try something.” He rubs the back of his neck, “To be honest, I didn’t think you’d get as far as you did. Michael is way too sharp, too alert. I didn’t think you’d get past him.” He regards me with a shrewd gaze, “But then, I don’t think he realized how smart you really are.”

“Is that a compliment?”

“One-hundred percent.” He grins and his face lights up. I blink. Shit, this man is truly handsome, in a very classical kind of way. He has the same kind of presence as Michael. To be fair, all of the Sovrano brothers do, as do their half-brothers. But in terms of charisma, Luca is the closest to Michael. Both fill up the room in a similar way. Both have that determined set to their features, the stubborn tilt to the jaw, that sense of dominance that rolls off of them in waves and which screams that they can be very persuasive and authoritative, and that once they set their minds on something, nothing can deter them. Only he isn’t Michael.

I slip back into my seat at the table, and he tilts his head. “I am guessing my brother was so taken in with you, he lowered his guard. It’s why you managed to slip by him.”

I play with the ring on my left hand. I’d tried to remove it in the shower, but of course, the stupid thing is stuck. It refuses to come off. “I think you are wrong,” I murmur. “Michael never lets his guard down. Not with anyone, and certainly, not with me. It was a lucky break that I found myself alone and decided to risk running out of there.”

And the main reason I’d wanted to leave was because I’d thought that I could be pregnant. How had I forgotten about that? Shit, it’s too early to test if I am. Probably… I could wait for a week or more at least, right?

And what if I am pregnant and he’s dead? Does that mean I would bring up my child without a father? I am keeping the kid, of course. That’s assuming I am pregnant. And if I am not… Well then… I’ll still be on my own, after Michael… How could I ever be satisfied with anyone else?

Shit, he’s the one, isn’t he? Why have I taken so long to recognize that? But this doesn’t change anything… Even if I had stayed… Even though it felt like he was changing his attitude toward me… Even then, he was a man on the wrong side of the law. He kills people for a living, for hell’s sake. He’s not the kind of man I’d want as the father of my child, or the type of person, I’d want to stay married to… Right?

And yet… I’ll never be able to forget him, or how my body had responded to him. Shit, shit, shit. I lower my chin to my chest. If only things had been different. If only he weren’t in the Mafia and I had met him in more normal circumstances. If only I’d had a chance to date him like a normal person, and…

Who am I kidding? Michael would never be a ‘normal’ anything. That man has too much dominance, too much self-assuredness, too much confidence… Too much everything. He’ll always stand apart from others. He’ll always be different… And fact is, the sense of danger that clings to him only adds to his allure. The darkness in him… It’s what drew me to him. The sense of menace that hovers about him… It’s a turn on. The fact he wields instruments of violence like other people employ pens…is what appeals to me.

So why is it that when I thought I was pregnant, my first instinct was to escape from him? Is it because I think I can’t trust him when it comes to my child? Because I don’t know how he would react when he finds out? Because I know he’ll want the child… And then what? Would he forget about me completely after that? Would he want me to conform to the role of wife and mother and lose my individuality completely? Shit. What’s wrong with me? A dull headache drums at the backs of my eyes and I draw in a breath. “I think I need to lie down,” I murmur.

Luca glances up at me, “Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” I swallow. “It’s been a long day. I need to get some rest.”

I am woken up by the sound of knocking on the door. “Karma,” Luca calls out, “you awake?”Property of Nô)(velDr(a)ma.Org.

I clear my throat, “I am now.” I glance around to find the sun’s rays slanting through the open window. I reach for the lamp near the bed and turn it on.

“Can I come in?” he calls through the door.

I sit up in bed, glad I had worn all of my clothes when I’d gone to sleep. “You can come in now,” I reply.

Luca enters, and his features are set.

“What happened?”

“I’m afraid it’s not good news,” he murmurs, as he leans a hip by the doorway.

My heart begins to thud and my throat closes. “Wh…what do you mean?”

“I managed to connect with one of my team and…”

“And…?” My voice cracks. I fold my fingers together, narrow my gaze on him, “Tell me, please, what did you find out?”

“It’s Michael, he…” Luca swallows, “he didn’t make it.”

Karma

I stare at him, trying to process his words, trying to make sense of what he said. “What do you mean he didn’t make it?” I throw the covers off, jump out of bed. “Who did you speak to? Maybe they are lying. He made it out of the water. Of course, he did. He had to… You, yourself, said that he’s not easy to kill, that he had a hard head, remember? He has to be alive. He can’t be dead.”

Luca shakes his head, “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, “Seb announced it at a meeting of the family. He is taking over temporarily as Capo.”

“No,” I shake my head, “no, no, no, it can’t be true.” The world tilts and my vision narrows as black spots creep into my periphery. I blindly reach behind me, find the edge of the bed, and sink back down. “Please, no. Not M… Michael.” My voice breaks and tears flow down my cheeks. I cover my face in shame.

How could this have happened? How could I have killed my…own husband…the possible father of my child? The only man who’s ever touched that part deep inside of me, who awoke that darkness in me… Who made me feel so alive. Who…loved me. I know he did. I saw it in his eyes right before he went under. My throat closes, my ribcage tightens and something hot stabs at my chest. Oh, Michael, Michael, what have I done? I grab my pillow and squeeze it tightly as I begin rocking.

How can I make up for this? What can I do to repent for my mistake? For having killed the man I love? My fingers tremble and a cold sensation grips me. I lift my head and glance up at Luca, “I need to go.”

“Where?” He frowns.

“To Michael.”

“Karma,” he squats down in front of me, “Michael’s gone.”

“His funeral.” I clear my throat, “I need to attend his funeral.”

“No,” he scowls, “that’s impossible.”

“Why?” I set my jaw. “He was the Mafia Capo. Surely, they’ll have a big funeral for him so everyone can pay their respects.”

“If you go, if they see you, you’re dead.”

“I’m dead now,” I reply. “I feel like I cannot breathe, cannot live after this. I…” I hunch my shoulders, “How can I live with myself after what I’ve done? I…need to go see him and apologize to him. I can’t go on without seeing him one last time.”

“That is a seriously bad idea,” he groans. “If, by some miracle, you get near the casket, they will shoot you on sight, or worse.”

“I don’t care.” I firm my lips, “I must see him, so I can tell him…” How sorry I am for what I did. Not for having run away, but for having hit him with that oar. He’d been coming after me. He’d wanted to pull me…his wife away from leaving with another man. He hadn’t been thinking straight when he’d jumped in the water and swum toward me. He’d lost his control, shown his weakness and I… I had taken advantage of it.

Damn it, I have to see him one last time. See his gorgeous face, kiss… his forehead, say my goodbyes… I’ll never get closure for what I did, but… I can, at least, tell him how I feel. Tell him that I love him. I owe him that much, surely. “I…” I swallow, “Please, I need to go to him.”

Luca rises to his feet and begins to pace, “Not only are you going to die, but you are going to get me killed with you.”

“You don’t have to come with me.”

He snorts, “What if my brothers stop you?”

“I’ll take my chances.”

“Shit.” He digs his fingers in his hair and pulls at it. “Seems even here, my dear fratellone beat me at my own game. I left the clan so I could find a way to challenge him, to show him I could wield more power than him. Just one time, I wanted to sit at the same table as him and show him I was his equal, but the bastard had to go one up on me here, too.” He stops, turns to me, “And if I refuse to help you now, he’ll probably never forgive me. The stronzo will probably come back to haunt me.”

He blinks, and I swear, I can see his eyes shining with unshed tears. Guess he loved his brother in his own way. And me… How had I loved him? As a wife, his submissive, his slave…his…captive? All of the above? I bite the inside of my cheek. “So, you’ll help me?”

He stares at me, then jerks his chin.

Some of the tension drains out of my muscles. “I’ll probably need to get a different set of clothes.”

He stares at my red-colored hair, “That’s probably a good idea.” He tilts his head, “We’ll need to get there first thing in the morning.”

“So soon?” I stiffen. Not that it would mark a difference, but I’d hoped I could get some kind of a grace period, at least a day to prepare?

“The Mafia prefer to bury their loved ones as quickly as possible. So, we need to get to the vigil before tomorrow evening.”

Right. “Will you help get me the clothes I need?”

He blows out a breath, then nods.

“Thank you,” I murmur

“You won’t be thanking me when my brothers come after you.”

I set my jaw. “We’ll see about that.”